Real Witches Are Pretty Sure Donald Trump Doesn’t Know What A Witch Hunt Actually Is

Even a congressman for Salem, Massachusetts is not having it



It’s hardly a secret that real witches of all types, from assorted spell-casters to Lana Del Rey, have declared their opposition to President Donald Trump. (Even the Satanic Temple has lent their voice against the Orange One!) Leading up to the election, various sorceresses, clairvoyants, alchemists, and diviners banded together in attempts to prevent our current situation. Now, in the wake of an increasingly explosive investigation into Trump’s team’s ties to Russia, our nation’s leader took to Twitter to declare his persecution a “witch hunt.”

Trump’s claims are quite obviously ludicrous, as per usual. Merriam-Webster defines a “witch hunt” as “the searching out and deliberate harassment of those (such as political opponents) with unpopular views.” The phrase has come to describe a manufactured rooting out of a political victim due to paranoia or for strategic gains. The current investigation into Trump and his team, which seems to be turning up new red flags every few minutes, clearly does not meet that definition. Similarly, the comments minimize the actual seriousness of historic witch hunts around the world, which claimed the lives of countless individuals (usually women!) in America and Europe.

“The thing about calling it a ‘witch hunt’ that’s especially problematic is that it infers people are searching for something that doesn’t exist,” says Melissa Madara, co-owner of Catland Books, a Brooklyn occult shop which hosts monthly Trump hexing events. “It infers that the allegations against the president are as made up and reactionary as a hunt for witches, despite mounting evidence to the contrary. Witch hunts took place to root out outspoken, independent women. And remember: People died. To appropriate the oppression and slaughter of women to dismiss his very serious allegations is a brave new low for the Trump administration, but shockingly also doesn’t deviate from his party line too much.”

In the wake of this outrageous comment, actual occultists and other assorted experts are responding en masse. One scathing retort comes by way of The Icelandic Sorcery Museum:

This idiot of all idiots does not have any idea of what witch-hunting is. Not a clue. About anything. 

Another comes from Congressman Seth Moultan, who represents Salem, Massachusetts. You know, the place where the country’s most historic witch hunt actually occurred?

As the Representative of Salem, MA, I can confirm that this is false. 

Other politically-oriented groups of magick users are banding together to demonstrate their discontent with our current administration:

I want to point out that there’s a movement of REAL WITCHES going after Trump. It started w/ at the Women’s March Jan. 20. 1/

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But now W.I.T.C.H groups have sprouted up all over the U.S. This is Detroit. Members have to be anonymous. 2/

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W.I.T.C.H. stands for Witches’ International Troublemaker Conspiracy from Hell. 3/

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So…yeah. There IS a witch hunt against Trump. The witches are doing the hunting. 4/4

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If you thought this was great, you’re going to LOVE the Scold’s Bridle!

And even Lana Del Rey joined in on the anti-Trump brujeria earlier this year:

At the stroke of midnight Feb 24, March 26, April 24, May 23 ❤️ Ingredients can b found online 🍰

Meanwhile, right-wing political satirists have an entirely different interpretation of what’s going on here.

I cant imagine anyone fucking up a witch Hunt metaphor, one of the most straight forward metaphors in our language, worse than this

Now that Trump’s presidency seems on the verge of a complete collapse, it’s looking like all that moon-worshipping is starting to pay off.